Worst Valentine’s Day Gifts… So You’ll Feel Better About Your Stupid Candy Heart

Worst Valentine's Day Gifts

I’m a holiday person. My husband, no so much. He means well. Unlike me, he doesn’t think (and by that I mean plan obsessively) about whatever the next holiday is. So, for as long as I can remember, he’s given me flowers, a card, and candy on Valentine’s Day. I probably don’t deserve much more than that, since I tend to have some deep-seated sexist view that Valentine’s Day gifts are FOR the ladies, FROM the gents. Though I’d love some big surprise this year, in the big scheme of things, I do realize that it could be much worse.

Look. All I got you was a paper heart. (FreeDigitalPhotos.net/stock images)

I asked some of the web’s funniest mom bloggers to tell me about their worst Valentine’s Day Gifts ever. Puts it all in perspective!

An ex-boyfriend got me a very large soap/shampoo stand for my bathroom to try to organize me!! -Estelle Sobel Erasmus, Musings on Motherhood & Midlife

I had a boyfriend offer to help me stop eating carbs because it was making me fat. -Harmony Hobbs, Modern Mommy Madness

“Aren’t I gift enough?” (FreeDigitalPhotos.Net-stockimages)

On our first Valentine’s together (when I wasn’t even sure what our relationship status was) my now husband gave me comic books. Meanwhile, on that same Valentine’s Day, a nice Jewish soon-to-be-doctor (who would have made my Mom happy) asked me to go on a first date that evening and sent me a dozen roses (even though I actually told him “No” because he was a little stalkerish and there was Mr. comic book man). -Lisa Kramer, http://www.lisaakramer.com/blog/

My husband gave me a wet/dry shaver…which is ridiculous in February as I like to go full yeti all winter long. -Michelle Poston Combs, Rubber Shoes in Hell

My first Valentine’s Day with my now husband he bought me perfume….from the dollar store….and that was all. -Jaime Cole

An STD –Samara Speaks

A microwave. -Jennifer Scharf, Mom Coms

My husband gave me a wax-dipped teddy bear about 15 years ago. It stunk of nasty old candles and was sticky-that sucker gathered dust better than a Swiffer. The bear alone would have been cute but the wax-covered stuffed animal…not so much. -Vanessa Lane

An ex-boyfriend gave me a rhinestone encrusted bobby pin with a sparkly beetle bug on it. This is something I would never, ever wear. I was like what, do you know me at all?? -Pam Moore

A bouquet made of highlighters and post-its was my best Valentine’s Day gift ever, but my friends thought it was dump worthy. #nerdy -Megan Zander, Mommyish

My exfiancé got me a heating pad one year. –Victoria Fedden, Www.victoriafedden.com

4 comments

  • Michelle Poston Combs
    Michelle

    Hahaha..these are great! Thank you for including me.

    Reply
  • Vanessa van de Nes
    Vanessa

    I got pots and pans once and he told me that they were a hint… I told him if he really wanted to give me a hint he should have gotten me cooking classes because no matter how new the pots are the chef still cooks the same way! LOL

    Reply

What do you think? Chime in! Cancel reply

Exit mobile version