I have never liked Halloween. I don’t know if it’s because we never really celebrated it with my family when I was little or because I don’t like spooky and scary things. But now that I have kids I hate it even more. Tips for Halloween are required since I’m not a “Halloween Person.” I hate the competition amongst parents on whose kids have the best costume or who has the best house decorations. Even more, I hate the sugar rush […]
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Someone has to say it: Summer is coming to an end sooner than we’d like. That’s why we’ve put together five ways to get the most out of the end of summer.
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Once again, Father’s Day has completely snuck up on me. Yeah, yeah, I know it comes the second Sunday in June every year. But, see, I’m too busy being a MOTHER to have time to remember such things. So, I scramble yet again to find a meaningful, useful, and CHEAP Father’s Day gift for my husband. What I know he really wants…. Some sexy, sexy time… But Father’s Day is in JUNE. When school is out and kids are home. […]
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Father’s Day in our home has always been about golfing or fishing. 10 years ago my husband made me a Mom and I made him a Dad. On my first Mother’s Day, my husband bought me a piece of jewelry that I ended up having to return because money was so tight. He wanted so badly to give me a gift, but the budget wouldn’t allow it. Over the years, these holidays revolved around our own parents and their celebrations, […]
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Mother’s Day sucks. There, I said it! I fully admit it. It shouldn’t. I’m the proud and lucky mom of two great kids, a girl, 10, and a boy, 4. They are my life, my joy, and I couldn’t imagine my world without them. But see, I belong to this club, the one that no one ever wants to be a part of. I’m a card-carrying member of the “my mother is dead so Mother’s Day sucks club.” There are […]
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In the 17 years I’ve been married, I’ve learned how to get what I want. Or at least a cheaper version of what I actually want. The key is giving my husband a very clear list, complete with where to find the item. He’s mentioned more than once that I have “champagne tastes on a beer budget.” But I have a talent for sniffing out the cheapest champagne… OR the fanciest beer. (I’m not sure this metaphor is working…) Here’s […]
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We’ve got ingenious (and sometimes sneaky) solutions for how to get alone time this holiday season. December 26th is National Leave Mom Alone Day… Isn’t it? I adore my family, really. But too much of even a good thing can be a bad. Too much sunshine? Skin cancer. Too many bananas? Constipation. Even drinking too much water can kill you. B.C. (Before Covid), my husband was traveling maybe 80% of the time. (He’s a musician.) Now, with no live performances […]
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This time of year, Santa is getting all the press. But if Santa’s wife is like most of us, she’s probably doing at least half the work! Can you imagine being Santa’s wife? What do you know about the woman behind the man? Check out my brand-new video about what it would be like to be married to Santa. I started out with all kinds of G-rated cute jokes for this video. But somehow, as I was shooting, my mind […]
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Slacker Mom Saves Your Ass… Again. Ah, holy hell. It’s holiday gift-giving time. And if you’re a slacker like me, that means last minute holiday gifts. As if having to roast overstuffed bloated birds while squabbling children run underfoot wasn’t enough, we’re also expected to find and select personalized holiday gifts for family members far and near. And then wrap them. And then mail some of them. I’m tired already. Well, Slacker Mom’s Guide is back, ready to save your […]
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I used to be sexy on Halloween. Not Basic Sexy, like “sexy nurse” or “sexy mouse”, but Creative Sexy. At least I thought so. Instead of Little Orphan Annie I would be “Little WHOREphan Annie,” showing a lot of leg and whatever cleavage I could muster. One year I was “White Trash”, dressed in a short tight white dress with white garbage-like tissues and styrofoam cups and un-used tampons pasted all over it. You get the idea: something clever and/or […]
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