My LifeSuckers Deva Dalporto | Ask a Mom
What if you could ask internet-famous moms anything you wanted? That’s the premise behind our new live video series, “Ask a Mom.” Our first ever guest is one of the original YouTube moms, My Lifesuckers Deva Dalporto, creator of viral mom music video parodies.
If you have a favorite internet-famous mom, YouTube mom, or (gasp!) TikTok mom, you’d like to ask questions of, let us know who and we’ll do our best to set it up.
My LifeSuckers Dava Dalporto on “Ask a Mom”
Here’s a transcript of our interview, though watching the video about is much more fun! 😉
Jen: Hey. Welcome to MomCave. This is gonna be a new impromptu situation I’m going to try out once a week called “Ask a Mom.” And for the very first Ask a Mom I asked one of the original YouTube moms from MyLifeSuckers, Deva. Wait, that’s the wrong way. There’s Deva.
My Lifesuckers Deva: Hi. Original is code for “old.” Well basically. Yeah.
Jen: We watched Cocoon the other night and then my husband’s like “how long ’til we are like those people?” I was like, “Six months, about.”
Deva: At this rate. With the pandemic.
Deva: Two weeks.
Jen: Right. It’s like dog years. And so the, the parenting years the pandemic years, it’s not year for year. It’s like seven ten years per year. Yeah.
Deva: Really. Truth. Fact.
Jen: So crazy. So anybody who is watching, if you want to ask a burning question of MyLifsuckers Deva, you can put it in the comments and we’re gonna be reading the comments and if she doesn’t want to answer it she doesn’t have to. Um but.
Deva: I’ll answer anything.
Jen: Anything? Wow, you’re
Deva: My kids say I have no filter. It’s their least favorite thing about me.
Jen: Ah, you’re really opening up for a lot there. Hello AngelSerden. Hi Angel. All right. So Angel is in New York and um I have my own personal questions for you. That I wanted to ask you. Even though I might know the answers to some of these, but I wanted to just like verify here. Okay. So before you became a mom. BM. Before Mom. Um, before all of this MyLifeSuckers stuff happened. What was your like your dream or your vision of what would be happening?
My Lifesuckers Deva: Well, I thought I was gonna be a princess. Definitely. But, then I did some math. Which, math is not my strong suit. But I did some math, realized there were no princes that exactly lined up with me.
Jen: The current ones are way too young for us.
Deva: Yeah. So I gave up that dream and um no I always wanted to be an actress. That was my dream from the second I can remember even having you know, cognitive thoughts. I wanted to be an actress. I starred as Little Red Riding Hood on the stage in Kindergarten and that was it.
Jen: Your debut.
Deva: My debut.
Jen: Yeah. Um okay. And so then, you sort of you know that they always use that word in like the business books, of “pivot.” Like you pivoted. You pivoted by like using that and adding the momness to it. And you pivoted into something else.
Deva: Yeah. Well I tried the whole traditional Hollywood thing. I moved to LA after college and beat my head against the wall and all I heard was the word “no no no no.” And then finally I you know, cheesy as it sounds, YouTube let me say yes to myself and I got to just start creating my own things and no one could say no to me and it was amazing.
Jen: Yeah that’s so cool. Um was the first video that you made the “what does the kid say?” Or.
Deva: That was my first video. Yeah. It went viral. Which was insane. I wasn’t trying to be a YouTube mom. There were no YouTube moms when I made my first video. It wasn’t.
Jen: That was one of my questions. Like did you know that was a thing, were you following other YouTube moms and trying to be one?
Deva: There were none. There were no other YouTube Moms.
Jen: Oh wow.
Deva: I’m the original. Yeah. So no. I wasn’t following. There were YouTubers.
Jen: But they weren’t moms. Yeah. They were like young gaming boys.
Deva: Way too cool. For me to know about.
Jen: Way cooler than moms.
My Lifesuckers Deva:I didn’t even know you could get YouTube subscribers until a year and a half into making videos.
Jen: Oh all those missed opportunities. Darn. Angel is saying the OG. Yeah, she’s the OG. If you guys have any questions for Deva pop them in the comments. Okay so. You make this viral video. Let me just step back one moment. What? What made you think this was a good idea? Why? What was the idea? How did this come about?
Deva: Well I wasn’t intending for anyone to see it. I made a video. Well, dialing way back. Wanted to be an actress. Failed miserably. Had children. Got a job writing for Nickelodeon for their parenting website where I wrote funny articles about you know getting snot out of babies’ noses.
Jen: So funny. So funny.
Deva: And I kind of got my chops on creating content for the internet there. And I was there for seven years and then I got Hashimoto, which is this incurable autoimmune disease. And I had to go on leave from my job, because I couldn’t make it through the day. I was so exhausted and two kids, Hashimoto’s. It just was not. Working mom. Not going well. So went on leave. My husband bought me a video camera and he was like “here, remember your dream of being an actress.” And I was like, “screw you.” But with the F-word.
Jen: A little busy right now.
Deva: Yeah. I’m a little busy right now. But eventually after months of the camera sitting there I had an idea. The fox was going viral. You know, “what does the fox say?” Oh no, that’s my version. Sorry. And I made it, “What does the kid say?” And then we only put it on YouTube so our friends and family could see it. ‘Cause like I said, I didn’t know it was like a thing.
Jen: Yeah. Totally.
Deva: It went viral. I was shocked. Yeah. And disturbed.
Jen: That’s awesome. That must have been crazy. Do you think that when your husband gave you the camera he anticipated that he would then later, maybe even be the brunt of some of your videos? Or be in your videos.
Deva: No. Had he known I don’t think, Yeah. I don’t think he would’ve opened that Pandora’s Box.
Jen: It would’ve changed everything. Yeah.
Jen: You’ll notice my husband is never in my videos.
Deva: Yeah. And he’s such a great performer. He needs to get in there.
Jen: He is a performer, but it’s very like a very separate thing. Because I don’t know. I’m myself here. Right? I’m not like a character so much. And when you play a character you have like a shield, but we’re just letting it all hang out.
Deva:I’m just having this conversation with a friend of mine who is an actor and saying how different it is.
Deva: There’s no acting unfortunately happening with what we do.
Jen: No. And a lot of why I started doing a lot of what we do is like, it’s okay if a kid runs in with the snotty nose and you have to deal with it, because the people that are our audience like they get that and in fact they’re kind of like “cool, okay.” She can’t complete a sentence either. And it’s okay.
My Lifesuckers Deva:Yeah and when that video went viral of the little baby coming in on the
Jen: The BBC cut. The guy on the BBC.
Deva: Yeah. I was like Oh okay, that’s my life like every day. But yeah. Okay dad. Go viral.
Jen: I know. I thought the same thing. It was all over the news. I wrote a blog post about it and they were like and it was just like that’s what happens to moms that work at home every day. Why is this news?
Deva: And you know it was so interesting about that one. And now we’re getting all deep, but it was so interesting how Mommy came in and like swooped in right, and like grabbed the kid and rushed out. And I recently saw this happen again with a dad. And the dad took the kid and put him on his lap and continued the interview and I was like, “that’s the one I like.”
Jen: That’s a pro. That’s a pro. He took responsibility because you’re always a parent, even when you’re like in work. You’re a parent. You don’t get to stop. That was something I had a lot of trouble with when we first had kids too, of like you’re the, a lot of times the woman for some reason gets to be the default parent. So I was like you know, you’re the one that has to swoop in or make sure you always have to be there and then of course, it’s really hard to come across as professional and responsible at whatever job you’re attempting.
My Lifesuckers Deva: Well, I say I will only have business dealings or conference calls with people with kids screaming in the background or otherwise I don’t trust you. I’m sorry.
Jen: Right. I’m like you have too much free time on your hands. Too much time to think. If you have like a silent house. I mean and everybody is now experiencing this in the last year, because of so many people having to work from home.
Deva: Welcome to our Hell.
Jen: We’ve already been living this. Speaking of that, I saw your last video that you made is the Barenaked Ladies song “One Week.” Everybody, Deva did “One Year,” and it’s about the Pandemic.
Deva:Yep. We made it.
Jen: What is your situation currently, if you don’t mind sharing. What schooling? Are your kids in school or are they home with you?
Deva: Yeah. Well they’re home right now, because they’re on a two-week-long Spring Break. Which should be illegal. But they actually. Yeah. But they actually did go back. My son went back two weeks ago and it was amazing. It was like a miracle. He had gone from like you know lying in his bed miserable refusing to turn his camera on, on Zoom. Refusing to get dressed to now like so happy and bounding and off to school with his mask on. So.
Jen: That’s wonderful.
Deva: Yeah. We’re finally back.
Jen: They really need that. I just heard somebody from New York City say today like the kids like her kid had just gone back for just a few days or a week and then they just closed school again. So. They had like the tease. It’s tough. It’s very rough.
Deva: I hear ya. For us too.
Jen: Totally. I’ve also learned that there is no way that I will ever homeschool and that if I were a teacher I would be fired.
Deva: Same. And same. Same and same. Yeah. Bow down to teachers. Homeschooling moms. I don’t know how they do it.
Deva: I don’t have patience. Patience isn’t a quality I possess.
Jen: It’s very difficult to have patience when you have… Like you don’t… You can’t just focus on the one thing. So there’s so many things coming at you. I would say it’s like too many inputs. I can’t.
My Lifesuckers Deva:You have no idea the deep level I’m relating to that on right now.
Jen: Too much stimulus. Something has to shut up. Someone has to shut down. You know. So that I can focus. But.
My Lifesuckers Deva: Yes.
Jen: Yeah. So that was that. I… What were some of my other questions for you? You’re like answering them, my questions already. Okay. Oh. Of all of your videos that you’ve made, what’s your favorite one?
Deva: Oh. You know people ask me this question and I… It’s like asking your favorite child in a way.
Jen:Whoever’s behaving at the moment.
Deva: I love them all when they’re behaving and doing well. No.
Jen: Right. You can’t think of… You don’t have to if you can’t.
Deva: Yeah. I don’t know. I love the Adele video, because I actually like, it was very like glam and fun and shot it in sepia and it was very artsy. I loved “Look What You Made Me Do.” The Taylor Swift parody. That one was super fun. Spice Girls was probably the most fun ever to shoot, because I was just with my friends. That was really fun.
Jen: I’ll leave those ones in the comments later, so people can find them and see them.
Deva: Aw thank you. Yeah, I love “If Moms Were Uber Drivers.” That was really fun. I had a friend of mine who was a former marine and I just needed someone like really straight to play against me and we just improved that whole thing and my daughter was just amazing and it’s like… Imagine if you had your kids and crazy chaos that happens in the car and then you pick up an Uber passenger. And it was so fun. We had so much fun.
Jen: That was a good one. At my house my kids know of you, because they call you the “Let it Go Mom.” Because of the “Let it Go” parody. And they just thought that was so hilarious. They’ve asked to see it over and over and over. And that’s something that I think is cool. Like kids watch your videos too, yes?
Deva: Yes. Which you know, I had, after the first video went viral and I realized oh maybe I’ll make another one or, which “Let it Go” was my second parody. I didn’t at that time realize that kids were watching. I figured it was moms, but I had made a decision not to curse or drink or do all these other things on camera, that I do in my real life.
Jen: Whoa, whoa whoa. Stop right there. That’s a whole question in and of itself. So we’ll get back to, why did you make that decision?
Deva: I actually think I made that decision with like my mom in mind, or like parents in mind. And thinking like, older people might see this and I just wanted, you know I don’t know. Model good behavior and reflect good behavior and looking back I am so happy I made that decision for multiple reasons. One is when I realized kids were watching. We’re on vacation in Hawaii and these two little kids came running up, and they’re like “Yo are you the mom on YouTube?” And I was like It was the moment that I realized… Oh my gosh. ‘Cause their parents had no idea who I was and the fact that the kids recognized me I had a big ah-ha moment.
Deva: But yeah. I’m really glad and I can feel confident there’s no cursing and it’s all clean. I feel okay with my kids watching, other kids watching. So, that’s good.
Jen: You’re so good. I must say.
Deva: Thank you. If you can hear my mouth in real life you wouldn’t be saying that, but yeah.
Jen:That makes me feel a little better. I took the opposite tact when I started making videos and I was like let’s make videos that are not for kids, but my kids haven’t seen a lot of them. But I’m realizing that could be an issue. I’m putting on my headphones. ‘Cause I’m getting an echo. Hold on.
My Lifesuckers Deva: Oh no worries, I can’t see it.
Jen: Okay. What did I go away?
Jen: Okay, am I back? Are we here?
Deva: We’re back.
Jen: Okay good. Can hear myself like crazy now. I decided that I would just make the videos for the moms, but there have been times when I’m like oh what I just said, my mother in-law is going to hear that. Or my grandma is gonna hear that and my kids are now old enough that if they wanted to, if they were wily enough they could see the videos and find them.
Deva: Let’s be honest. They’re better at, they’re more wily at the internet than we are. So.
Jen: Oh totally. I have kids YouTube on the iPad for my daughter, but I don’t know. I thought that would make it safer, but there’s still a lot stuff on there that I wouldn’t really want her to see.
My Lifesuckers Deva: Yeah, I’m sure. I think I’ve cracked through some of my videos have cracked through onto kids YouTube. I’m not sure all of them have.
Jen: Oh cool. It’s too bad you can’t have like two different personas. But one good thing, this was one of my questions. And it’s kind of a serious question. Because I did know that you don’t drink in your videos and you’re not promoting the whole, the thing we’re now calling the “Mommy Wine Culture.”
Jen: And again, I tend to make those jokes. I’m guilty of it. You know I… We drink on MomCave all the time. But it’s becoming something that I’m becoming more aware of too because close friends are now being like, “that makes it difficult for me, because I’m trying to be sober.” Or whatever. So I was curious, like what your opinion of the whole Mommy Wine Culture is? Or the… Do you think it’s a big problem?
Deva: Yeah. I don’t love it. I think sending the message of, my kids drive me to drink is…
Jen: I know. It’s bad, it’s bad. For them to see that.
My Lifesuckers Deva: I’m not judging. I’m not judging. Because let’s be honest. But I worry that my kids are going to hear that and think like “oh yikes.” Right. “Do I really?” And that’s not, I mean my videos are all about you drive me crazy. So really like, where’s the line here? So I’m not judging at all. I did start working with Responsbility.org Early on in my career. They were my first client and so I feel like I was educated a lot about how to talk to kids about alcohol and how to start those conversations really early and have them in little bite sized pieces and what kind of behavior to model. So I was kind of being educated by them as I was doing my journey on the internet. And you know, but it’s an easy joke and a good way for a laugh, and sometimes like “Ah this would be so much easier if I just had a bottle of wine. Ha ha ha.” But. Or if I cursed, right? It’s so much easier to be funny when you curse.
Jen: You have to work harder at your jokes.
Deva: Yeah. Alcohol-free Curse-free content. I’m not funny at all. And there you go.
Jen: You’re very funny so that’s what makes you special. That’s very good. Let’s see. Oh. What about of all, there’s all these social media platforms and there are always new ones. So you started on YouTube. We’re doing this on Facebook. And I know I follow you on Instagram. Are you doing the new things that the kids are doing like the Tiktok and the Clubhouse? Do you do those?
My Lifesuckers Deva: So I was on Snapchat for like a hot second, but I literally could never even figure out how to post. So. So that was done.
Jen: No Snapchat. Yeah I haven’t even tried that one.
Deva: No Snapchat. And then I… It started to dawn on me, and I was kind of late to the game on Tiktok, that Tiktok might really be where I really belong. It might be my true home on the Internet. And so I… Tiktok is obviously over. Hashtag “Tiktok is Over Party.” Because the moms.
Jen: Right. The moms got there. I finally did it. And then I’m like, “oh that means it’s over.” We missed it.
My Lifesuckers Deva: Yeah. Right. My kids are like, “oh you’re on Tiktok? Okay. It’s done.” And then I did get a Clubhouse invite and I joined, but I’ve never done it and I just feel like I don’t want anymore platforms. I can’t handle my life as it is. I don’t need another social media platform.
Jen: More variables. More notifications. I don’t think Clubhouse is very conducive to parenthood, because if people who are listening
Deva: With audio, right?
Jen: It’s audio. So it’s basically like going to a conference where there’s many rooms and people are doing talks on different things and you can go into any room and you can listen to the talk and you can ask, you know, raise your hand and ask to talk yourself. But that’s not something you can do when you have kids around all day. Like you can’t just be listening to audio. So yeah, it’s not working for me. The Clubhouse.
Deva: Yeah. Yeah.
Jen: What do the kids do now? Does your daughter, is your… have they moved on ’cause I honestly don’t know. Where are the kids?
Deva: So yeah. My kids aren’t on social media.
Deva: I know. I know, it’s shocking. So we had a rule. 9th grade. You’re allowed to get on social… I’m coming off in this like I’m…
Jen: Y’all watch her videos, because she really is a hot mess like freaking out Mama.
Deva: I make all my own Playdough.
Jen: Maybe it’s just next to me. And it’s like in comparison. You seem responsible.
My Lifesuckers Deva: I make gluten-free Playdough from scratch. No I’m just kidding. If you could see my laundry pile in the other room you would feel better. No. So our rule was no social media until ninth grade. But you can binge on all the video games and do you know, like fourteen hours a day on Minecraft. So that’s fine. So when ninth grade rolls around for my daughter she just has no interest.
Jen: Oh that’s amazing.
Deva: Yeah. Mom hack. Mom hack.
Jen: Nice. Make them wait ’til ninth. I like it.
Deva: Make them wait. And then they. She’s like, “yeah, well I don’t… What would I post? Also mommy does social media for her job so it’s not that cool.”
Deva: Yeah it’s not very cool to her. ‘Cause she’s like, “Oh god.”
Deva: Instagram. Like mom’s on Instagram. Right? So.
Jen: Well again, it’s like that reverse psychology. Whatever you don’t want your kids to do you should do it.
Deva: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Jen: Anybody whose watching ask a question of Deva, we’re almost done and I want you to be able to ask her any of your burning questions. I’m not gonna keep you forever. I have kids outside that haven’t killed each other yet. What was I saying? I forgot what I was saying.
My Lifesuckers Deva:Thank you Lana Lynn. It’s first of all very funny and second of all, also thank you for being real with my perfect gluten-free homemade Playdough.
Jen: Very. Very perfect.
Deva: Have you ever made Playdough? I’ve never made Playdough.
Jen: I don’t think I’ve ever made Playdough no. I mean the Playdough that you buy is so great and cheap, why would you make it?
My Lifesuckers Deva:That’s how I felt about baby food, but then like you know, fourteen years later I find out what, it has arsenic or something?
Jen: I’m sure it has bad things. This is, I have this issue. I live in a very crunchy organic-loving Hippie area and I love these people and I want to be healthy too, but I am not and so I often feel really like out of place, and I definitely know I get judged. My son told his class that we ate at McDonald’s, and like he’s never heard the end of it. And the kids, they like parrot. You know they’re saying whatever they’ve heard their parents say to them.
My Lifesuckers Deva: Oh wow.
Jen: There’s like such judgment. Like he told them two years ago or something and the kids in his class are still, “you eat at McDonald’s?”
Deva: Oh my gosh. Yeah. We would not do well there.
Deva: Hi Dina.
Jen: Hi. Dina’s saying hello. Dina’s my other MomCave friend. Who couldn’t join us just now. Okay. I have one last subject I want to ask you about. Because we were talking all about your YouTube videos, which most people know, but I have noticed that you’ve made other videos that are not like the music-video parody format, over the years. You’ve tried different things. So can you like tell me about. I’m gonna read this comment first. “My house is crazy,” says Amy. “I have a soon-to-be fourteen year old girl and two year old boy twins and a six month old.” Oh my gosh. Amy. I don’t know how you’re even watching this right now, but I bow down to you. I only have two and Dina’s in the orthodontist waiting room. Okay.
Deva: But I agree with Amy that the teenagers are like worse. It’s the emotional torture they put us through. Like I feel like every day is in a, is like a rollercoaster, emotional torture ride. It’s just…
Jen: I am not looking forward to that. Mine are a little younger, but I see like the glimpses of it and I’m just terrified. I don’t know.
Deva: I laugh that when I die they’re gonna just write, “She” on my tombstone, because everything in my house, “She is so mean.” “She won’t let us.” “She said.” And it’s this “She.” They use it like this…
Jen: Yes. Yeah. And I’m the bad guy. I don’t know about you, but it’s always like, “mom said we couldn’t bla bla bla bla, and dad you said we could do this.” And then you know, I’m the bad guy.
Jen: I just have to deal with it. So okay. My last question is about your other… I’m thinking there are hidden MyLifeSuckers gems that people might not know about, because they didn’t go viral, or they’re not music video parodies. So is there any of those you want to tell us about?
Deva: Hidden gems. Oh gosh. There’s a lot of videos I don’t want anyone to see.
Jen: We won’t link to those. I know you did like a news thing for a while. Like were doing the news report.
Deva: That was really fun. I did the Real Mom News Show and it was like, you know fake news stories. That was ages ago. That was really fun. Those are fun to look back. There was like “Breaking News” on like “Dad Emptying the Dishwasher.” Or actually he doesn’t, he goes to put something in it and realizes it’s full and then like sneaks away and it’s like a crime-scene drama. Yeah that was really fun. I did a lot of like parenting hacks that are not good advice. Potty Talk was my little talk show when the pandemic hit. I did on Zoom from the bathroom. So that was something I had been wanting to do forever. I’d actually shot a few of those in like 2013 and then never put them out and then finally did it when the Pandemic hit. So that was fun. Yeah. And then just little sketches. But the sketches do better than the music videos sometimes. So I don’t know. It’s so hard to know what’s gonna do better.
Jen: We have some nice comments from Thomas. He says, Thomas must be a pediatrician. He says, “He officially endorses your videos.” And I don’t know how to pronounce “Daff.” That’s a beautiful name. Daff is thanking you for making videos. Yeah.
My Lifesuckers Deva: I’m seeing too. Hi guys! I know both of those people from my peeps. Yeah. Thomas is saying we need wine after this year. Truly, honestly can we all just give ourselves a little pat on the back. Like…
Jen: We’ve made it a year.
Deva: We’ve made it a year. This has been insane.
Jen: I need Botox.
Deva: Oh yeah me too. I was just thinking that. I’m gonna get it. I’m done. I’m done with this face.
Jen: I’m done. I can’t afford Botox after this last Pandemic.
Deva: My friend got bangs and she called it “the poor person’s Botox.” So I’m like that’ll work. I’ll just do bangs.
Jen: Let’s do our bangs. I always thought I’d look bad with bangs. So. I don’t know .
Deva: I look great with bangs, ’cause my face is too long. Why are we doing this?
Jen: I don’t know. We’re just torturing ourselves while looking at our images.
Deva: Now I’m getting a little too real and honest. Okay, body positivity.
Jen: Yeah. We’re very positive about our lives and we’re wise beyond our years. I think my kids are starting to like, a fight or something. So it’s probably a good time to wrap this up. But I’m very grateful that you humored me to answer all of my biting questions and people who don’t know Deva, go check out MyLifeSuckers. She is again, not old, but one of the original YouTube moms. The original and funniest. My Lifesuckers Dava. Thank you so much.
Deva: Thank you for having me on. This was fun. This was so fun. I feel like I got to get away from my kids and talk with a girlfriend.
Jen: I know. We got to talk with a girlfriend. We went longer than I thought, because it was fun. So that’s awesome. I’m gonna do little Q&A’s again with other people and maybe find out some more interesting mom facts, but okay. I’m gonna go referee a fight and thank you very very much and thank you everyone for watching. Bye.
Find Deva and My Lifesuckers on all the platforms:
Her website: MyLifesuckers.com
Love MyLifesuckers Dava Dalporto and want more?
Dava’s MomCave LIVE episode about “Let it Go!”
Dava’s MomCave LIVE episode about “Stressed Out Moms”
Dava’s Bohemian Rhapsody parody, “Bohemian Momsoday”