Motherhood (while amazing, life changing and “one of the best things you’ll ever do”) is wrought with all kinds of Mom AILMENTS.
The side effects of Motherhood may include:
1. Lack of sleep/ Exhaustion – I’d like to say this starts when the baby arrives, but honestly for many of us, it happens once the pregnancy hormones kick in and really doesn’t go away until the kids are off to college… just in time for the insomnia of menopause. So, I hope you got enough winks in when you were younger, because now that you have kids, you’re pretty much screwed when it comes to rest.
2. Headaches – “Mom! Ma! Mommmmmy! Make him stop! He won’t give me my toy! Where are my socks?! NO, I won’t do it! You can’t make me! Mom! Mommy! MA! PLEASE! Why can’t I have ice cream before dinner? NO I won’t eat my peas, go to bed or wash my hands.” – I don’t think I need to explain any further why we all suffer from headaches on a regular basis. It’s also an AMAZING excuse to hide from your family in one’s room with the lights off. “Mommy has a headache” might just be a good enough excuse to get them to leave you ALONE for 5 MINUTES! And now maybe you can catch up on the sleep you also desperately need.
3. Hearing Loss – From all the screaming and crying, obviously. (See above.) The only hearing that doesn’t seem to suffer is the mommy hearing that kicks in. You may not be able to hear what your kids are saying to you from another room, but if they are doing or saying something they are NOT supposed to be doing, you’ll hear it all with x-ray precision. It’s one of the primordial survival skills that crop up once you have children, similar to the eyes that grow in the back of your head.
4. Mommy Bladders – A sprinkle while you work out? A tinkle when you sneeze? You can thank the kiddos for that. The whole area down there will NEVER be the same. And it’s ok. It doesn’t have to be. I, for one, cannot do jumping jacks in workout class without some sort of liner on, or an adult diaper. (How pathetic.) And YES! I HAVE tried kegels.
5.Back Pain – From carrying those little buggers while they were in your stomach to totting them on your hip once they’re here. Kids destroy your posture and can give you severe back pain. And once they’re off running on their own, they leave HUGE piles of dirty clothes in their wake so you can now break your back while lifting the laundry basket. And kids will find a way to make you carry them long after you should be. My 12 year old feel asleep in my bed the other night, and I tried to carry her up to bed. I couldn’t walk for a week.
6. Heartburn – This is another ailment that pretty much starts with pregnancy and NEVER goes away. Imagine all the over the counter antacids you could pop between the birth of your first born and when the last is out of the door? If you eat 500 doses of Tums or Rolaids in one year, you will have eaten almost 4,000 calories of sugar. That’s a LOT of antacids and a LOT of SUGAR! Lucky for us mamas, we’ve discovered Maximum Strength Axia3 AND Axia4 ProDigestive antacids sweetened with xylitol which doesn’t cause a sugar spike but even reverses cavities and kills oral bacteria. So now your breath won’t stink and heartburn is GONE! It’s safe for diabetics, which is a huge help during pregnancy. Axia3 stops heartburn fast and releases 5 ProDigestive enzymes. Unlike traditional Antacids that interrupt digestion, Axia3 and Axia4 both work with your digestive system instead of against it. Axia4 is the first antacid with digestive enzymes AND probiotics for those who want to have for digestive balance. We even have a coupon code just for our MomCavers which will give you 20% off.
(This post is sponsored by Axia. All opinions are our own.)
Dina Drew, mother of 2, is a professional actress who has appeared on shows like "Limitless," "Law & Order: SVU," "Blue Bloods," "White Collar" and "Rescue Me;" as well as dozens of TV commercials. She is also a writer/blogger/ photographer/producer/meme maker and frequent contributor to MomCaveTV.com. To learn more about her visit www.dinadrew.com.