Games For Mothers MOMGAMES Sponsored By Piper Lou

This series of live games for mothers is sponsored by Piper Lou Collection, our favorite place to find clothing and drinkware that says it like it is.

When you hear “games for mothers,” do you think cutsie little baby shower games like “Guess the Size of the Baby?” 🤣 Do you even know us at all?? Here on MomCave, “games for mothers” means something much more fun than that!

Once the kiddos are in bed on Wednesday nights, we bring out our teacups or wine glasses (your choice!) and play games like “I Never: Mom Version” and “Parenting Truth or Dare.” The broadcast streams on Facebook, YouTube, and Instagram. (And maybe TikTok if we can figure that shizz out…) Obviously, this is all done remotely. Because we can’t ever find a babysitter… and I bet you have the same problem.

MOM GAMES is fully interactive, meaning YOU (yes, YOU!) can join in the games in the comments or even be invited on camera, if you wish. Or you can be a laughing comment lurker. Whatever makes the end of your long day mommin’ more enjoyable for you.

Sponsored by Piper Lou, we’ll give away some of their snarky, fun merch every week.

MOM GAMES Sponsored by Piper Lou — Games for Mothers MomCave-Style

Not familiar with the jewel of an online shop that is Piper Lou? You’ve got to check it out. They sell all kinds of shirts, hoodies, hats… thermoses to keep your coffee hot and wine tumblers to keep your vino cool. All with laugh-out-loud quotes, sayings, and pop culture references. Though we’re partial to their mom-themed merch, you can also find stuff for kids, dads, and professions like nurses and teachers. They personalize stuff, too!

And…. they’re giving all us MomCavers (that means YOU!) *Unlimited Buy 1 Get One Free* with code MOMCAVE. So go add a bunch of stuff to cart for the holidays.

They also have a super-exclusive VIP list for Black Friday. Go sign up here to get early access to the Black Friday deals and up to 70% off!

While 90% of Piper Lou is focused on fun/snarky/drinking designs, there is another part that is focused on giving back. Piper Lou donates 100% of Net Profits to many awesome charities. Everyone has been affected by various forms of cancer and other diseases. They work with vetted charities to sell items that are fashionable and functional, to raise awareness for those causes. Piper Lou prefers to work with small charities so that way our donations can be really impactful to how they operate.

Meet and Play MOMGAMES with some of the Internet’s Funniest Mamas

Every week, we feature a guest that will have us all laughing our mama-sized butts off as we play the kind of games for mothers that WE enjoy. The inaugural guest was Lauri Walker, from Mama Need a Nap. This mom of four runs a day-care by day and drinks and swears with us by night. We played the mom version of “I Never.”

For our second episode, we’re joined by Rachel Sobel from Whine and Cheez-its. We’re psyched to play our version of “F*ck, Marry, Kill” with this divorced and remarried funny mom.

Transcript of Moms Play “I Never” with Lauri Walker from Mama Needs a Nap on MOM GAMES Sponsored by Piper Lou

Jen: Welcome to MOM GAMES! This is where us young moms play games with you guys in the comments. It’s sponsored by Piper Lou, who makes some of the coolest Piper Lou mom merch. Not just mom merch, but snarky, awesome stuff. And we’re going to give away some of their stuff while we’re doing this. So comment away, play with us. Hey, I love seeing the comments coming in. I’m Jen from Mom Cave and my co-host is Dina. And we have a guest this week. Lauri Walker from Mama Needs a Nap. Hey Lauri Walker.

Lauri Walker: Hi! Hello. I’m so excited, cause I just happen to have a Piper Lou mug and it’s my favorite mug ever.

That is very exciting. Let’s show off our Piper Lou stuff.

Lauri Walker: I’m getting a glare but,

I like this. “Resting Grinch face.” I like it, I like it.

Howdy from Connecticut, Devin. Can we see me?

Nice. “Son of a nutcracker.”

[Jen] “Son of a nutcracker.”

Lauri Walker: I have a lovely mug that says, “We are best friends because everyone else sucks.”

That’s so cute.

That sucks, I mean, that’s great.

Lauri Walker: Everybody else.

Because everybody else sucks. These are great gifts. We’re going to give away some of this stuff. It’s piperloucollection.com. And if you use coupon code MOMCAVE, you get unlimited buy one, get one free, just saying, oh yeah, we’re going to talk about Black Friday later. Our game for tonight is going to be the mom version of “I Never.” Have you guys played “I Never” before?

Yes.

How long has it been?

Too long.

So we’re going to play the mom version of “I Never”, and I don’t think I’ve played this since college, and I’m not gonna say how long ago that was, but it was certainly before I had kids.

A way long time ago.

Yeah. So, in college when we played this, it was a drinking game, but we’re moms. So, you don’t know what’s in our mugs. It could be tea, it could be coffee, it could be water, it could be something else. You can put whatever you want in your mug. Lauri Walker’s face is like, “it’s something else.”

I’m not saying anything.

She’s not saying anything. So put whatever you want in your mug and we’re going to play. And just some people that say like the craziest things will be the people that will win the cool stuff from Piper Lou. You should tell people how the game works, duh. You can see, I’m great at this. I’m great at hosting live.

Lauri Walker: Never have I ever given directions.

Never have I ever told people how to play a drinking game. Never have I ever not given my kids a bath, let them run into a sprinkler, and counted that as their bath. So you drink if it’s something you have done. Sprinkler as a bath Dina, are you not drinking? What is the matter with you?

Dina: I always gave them a bath. I’m anal on that.

Jen: Oh my gosh. Dina’s a little OCD about cleanliness. So, I guess that one’s not going to work.

Dina: I am, sorry.

Jen: Yeah, we’ve got Shelby saying that.

Lauri Walker: But I always wash their feet, because I can’t not wash their feet before bed.

Jen: Well, their feet, if they were outside of the sprinkler, are probably really dirty, and then they’re tracking mud and shit all over your house. So of course, you’re going to wash their feet.

Lauri Walker: Have to wash their feet.

Dina: I’ve hosed them down before.

Jen: Did you use soap?

Dina: Down the shore, my son, when he was little, would get so much sand in his suit. So instead of taking him inside to shower him, I’d strip him, and shower him with the hose.

Jen: Did you use soap?

That doesn’t really sound…

Dina: I did, with the hose.

Jen: Okay. Well, we’ve got a comment saying that, that she also did that. Dina, do you have a good I never for us?

Dina: Never have I ever forgotten to move the elf and didn’t lie about it.

Jen: The elf is an adorable tradition, but whoever invented it, really didn’t think it through long-term.

No.

There’s like so many things we’re trying to remember during holidays. And then I have to remember to move this like tiny fake elf. I forgot a lot too, yes.

So I would basically tell the children that the elf was bad, and it was naughty, and it wasn’t moving because they were naughty.

That’s a good hack. But then after awhile it was like pretty obvious I was really forgetting it.

Or the elf was just an asshole.

Right, the elf was an asshole. I think I called the elf an asshole.

The elf was a narc. He’s like a tattletale to Santa. Why do you even let that guy in your house?

Yeah.

Jen; I’m all Grinched about the elf. How about you, Lauri Walker? Do you have an “I never” to contribute?

Lauri Walker: Never have I ever pretended my kid wasn’t my kid in public when he or she was throwing a fit.

Jen: Oh yeah. Does that count for other family members? Like potentially spouses? Just saying, yeah,

That might be a couple’s-

It could work.

-therapy thing, though.

It could work then too.

Lauri Walker: I’ve actually declared loudly. “You know what? When we get back to your house, I’m telling your mom how you behaved when we were at the grocery store!”

That is brilliant. That is very brilliant. Shelby said, “Doesn’t everybody have to drink for that one?”

I actually feel better now.

You feel better? It’s like a confessional.

I fell better that many people did that, because.

Jen: Yeah, of course, because it’s a very fine line. Like when you’re raising a kid and it’s so important to discipline them, but you’re in public and you’re so incredibly humiliated that it’s like, do I take this moment to be the good parent? Or do I just get the hell out of here? And not let them know?

Yeah. My child would never act like this. This is not my child.

This is not my child. This is somebody else’s child that I’m trying to train.

This is not my kid, not my kid. I’m sorry.

Jen: So, so somebody who contributes a great, I never idea to the comments is going to win something from piperloucollection.com. And for instance, this is one of my favorites. “Oh, balls.” cup “Oh, balls.” Dina, what does your drink say?

Dina: It says “Because of Elf on the Shelf!”

Jen: You see? There is even a drink cup about it and that’s how bad the elf is. Okay, this is a very simple one. I’ve never served cereal for dinner. Okay, good. Dina, that was a delayed drink. and you had me scared there for a second.

Dina: I had to think about it.

I had to think about it because like it’s not normally cereal. It’s usually Kix or scrambled eggs.

Yeah.

Lauri Walker: This is a trick one because I don’t SERVE cereal for dinner. It’s, “Hey, you’re on your own. And if cereals what you eat…”

Jen: It’s not serving.

It comes down to…

Right? It’s just go get the cereal. It’s not, not the same as serving, whatsoever.

Cereal for dinner? I’m not feeding shit to anybody. Y’all are on your own at that point. It’s not serving.

For sure. I’ve been serving people that were eating cereal for dinner. I have one, never have I ever forgotten my child somewhere.

Oh wait.

Come on, I’m gonna die.

Yeah.

Oh, thank God.

I don’t think I have, but I probably have.

Oh, come on. You never forgot to pick up

You know me, so somebody from somewhere?

I have. Well, you know that I probably forgot that I forgot.

Lauri Walker: I actually drove away and left my kid. At church.

Jen: At church. Well, you know what, that’s a safe place. You left them in a good place with good people. And maybe they needed a little extra church that week.

Dina: Jesus was babysitting! Jesus.

Lauri Walker: It was okay because my church is a small church, and so it’s like family and close friends. So normally my son would have been with his dad that day anyway. So it wasn’t like, I wasn’t, it wasn’t in my headspace that he was with me and we get in the car, my husband and I, we got my daughter in the car. We got halfway like two or three blocks away. And I remember I was eating a piece of chocolate because I choked, it went out my nose. And I was like, “Oh my God, turn the car around! Timothy, Timothy!”

Jen: Wait, how old was he?

Lauri Walker: He was two. We turn around, and we go back and like, you know, there’s like a gathering afterwards where everybody goes out in the fellowship hall and we’d had lunch or I dunno, whatever. And, and we were among the first to leave. There’s a lot of people there. And I leap out of the car before it stops and I fly in, and the door flings open. I probably could have hit a kid with the door, and everyone’s just looking. Cause they know that I’m going to come flying through this door. And my good friend looks at me and he goes, “Did you forget something?”

Yeah, totally. You totally forgot something.

Lauri Walker: He’s 21 now, and they still remind me of this.

Jen: Was he traumatized, or is he okay?

Lauri Walker: He didn’t even know I’d left. He was running around with his buddies, he didn’t care. Now he cares. Now, he’s like, “Remember the time you forgot me at church?” Like, no, you don’t remember, either.

Jen: You know, you should be like, I’ve driven you around. If you count the times that I HAVENT’T left you. And it’s like a ratio,

One time.

you have a great batting average so.

Never have I ever borrowed money from my children’s piggy bank.

Oh. It’s really?

Everybody drink twice.

How many times have I done that?

Okay, hold on a second.

Jen: Three, four, five, you know? this reminds me the other day, my son was saying like, “It’s time you start giving me an allowance, Mom, I’m doing all this work.” And I was like, I don’t think you understand how the family budget works. Because if I take the money and give it to you as an allowance, that means the family has less money for me to buy you things. So it’s like, we share, we’re a family.

Lauri Walker: Yeah. And if I give you an allowance, then the times that you get to come to me and say, “can I have money for whatever?” Yeah, that’s over.

Right?

Now you have your own money.

Jen: Totally, we don’t do allowance at my house.

Yeah.

Jen: It doesn’t work out well. Before we head on,

We don’t.

Jen: Before we head onto our next I never, I want to give my plug for Piper Lou and tell you guys about, you can join their email list for, it’s like the early bird, VIP black Friday email list. The link is in the comments. It just popped up. And you will get early access to black Friday and up to 70% off. So you can go buy a ton of stuff and for all your people. Okay. I’m hiding that now. Okay. And we’re back. That’s what we call the non-commercial break, people.

What is happening?

Jen: What is happening is that it’s the end of a long day momming. I’ll give you that. Okay. Dina, it’s your turn.

Dina: I just went.

Jen: It’s still your turn.

Dina: Oh, it’s still my turn?

Jen: I’m the mom.

Dina: Okay. Never, wait, never have I ever drunk. So never have I ever gotten piss drunk with my children around.

Jen: Ooh. I don’t know if I’ve gotten piss…

Or drunk.

Well, drink.

Like, you know, like, like you didn’t mean to, but like you had one too many and now all of a sudden, you have to moms something and you’re like, ahhh.

No, mommy needs to go to bed.

I wasn’t the only adult. So I wasn’t solely responsible.

Right.

Well, yeah, of course.

Yeah, absolutely. Yeah.

Then we’d be calling DFS.

Lauri Walker: I did it last week. So I drink like once a year, maybe once a year. And I did it, I did it the night before Halloween. Cause we had like the kids night out thing, and we left the kids at home because they’re old enough for that. And then we went out with some friends and I had a drink and then another drink and then I had another drink and I had another drink.

Jen: Did they tease you?

Lauri Walker: Oh yes. Well cause my one son was out with his friends and he had to keep, he was calling for stuff. And every time he called things got exponentially worse. And then finally it was like, look, dude, I’m drinking right now. And so I don’t know, I can’t help. You should call your dad. You should call your dad.

Call your dad.

Right.

Lauri Walker: And then my other son was home. And so he just thought that was very giggle worthy.

I think it was rather giggle worthy myself.

Dina: I got another one. Ready? Never have I ever taken my son’s or daughter’s dirty sports outfit and sprayed it with Febreeze instead of washing it.

That stuff gets smelly.

So there is, they only have like one or two of them. So I forget to wash them and it’s not that bad. And you’re like, shit, they need it now, so.

Lauri Walker: I haven’t done that one.

Jen: No?

Lauri Walker: How have I not? I have four kids and they were all.

Jen: Even worse, Lauri Walker, you just let them wear it without the Febreeze. That’s what it was.

Lauri Walker: Well, it never happened during wrestling season because you have to be careful like ringworm.

I don’t know how I never have done that.

Jen: I didn’t know we were gonna talk about ringworm. I don’t know how. Somebody has got to leave us really clever comment about something crazy that they have done because then you’re going to win something really cool from Piper Lou, just, just saying. It’s up for grabs, and I’m looking at these comments. Okay. I have one. This is from when my kid was a baby. I have never, ever fed my child homemade organic food from a BPA-free plastic spoon, while at McDonald’s, eating a Big Mac myself. Does that make sense?

It does, but when I used to go to the McDonald’s, I would eat the chicken nuggets.

How early can you feed them chicken nuggets? You can start chicken nuggets at like six months, right?

Yeah, my kids grew up on that.

Chicken nuggets are like gummy baby food, I guess.

Lauri Walker: Who was it? Wasn’t it like? Who’s the girl from Clueless?

Jen: Alicia Silverstone?

Lauri Walker: Wasn’t she the one that used to chew up her food and then give it to her kid?

Jen: Yes, that was in a bunch of articles. Yeah. Like a mama bird. She would chew her food in her mouth.

Lauri Walker: And then it was like an SNL sketch.

Yes. That’s kind of gross. But we are.

That’s not cool.

I’m saying if you’re going to do that though, you can start them on chicken nuggets earlier.

Jen: Or a big Mac. So I probably, I was just being silly. Like you do all the best things for the kid and you don’t give a crap about what you’re eating.

Yeah.

Dina: It’s just life. We have a comment: “I’ve done that to a uniform shirt after forgetting to do laundry.” I’m not the only one.

I’ve done it to my own clothes, I just couldn’t remember.

Jen: Well, during the sports season, it’s like it’s like every single day. It’s constant. So anyway, back to sports. Okay. Oh, this is a good one, never have I ever caught vomit in my bare hands.

Oh, if you haven’t done it, you’re not a mom.

Exactly.

Cheers.

Vomit, poop, pee, your friend’s blood, everything.

Every bodily fluid, you know.

God, exactly at my house.

Jen: Now, Lauri Walker, you own a daycare. So like you were probably so over it, you’ve dealt with every fluid. Yeah. I’m talking about all of the grossness that we like, it becomes a part of your daily life. And we now totally deal with, you know, when you do the dishes and at the end, there’s like gunk in the basket at the bottom of the sink. Before I had children, I never actually touched that gunk. Like I would take the little basket out, shake it out, or use a paper towel to get it out of the basket. And last night I was swilling gunk out with my hand, and I realized, I realized I’m like, nah, doesn’t bother me. I’ll touch anything.

Lauri Walker: Okay. You have to have some standards. You have to have some standards.

Dina: Where’s your rubber gloves, Jen? You don’t do dishes with the rubber gloves?

Jen: No.

Lauri Walker: I don’t even bother with that and I wash my hands 23 times day. No.

Dina: Gosh, no. If I, I don’t like touching the dishes.

Lauri Walker: My husband came home from work one day and he teaches high school, right? And I was like, he’s like, “How was your day?” And I go, “Literal shit.” And he’s like, “Oh yeah, the kids gave me all shit day.” And I’m like, “No, literally there was shit on me today. So unless someone actually put their feces on you, You should not come in this house because I was covered in literal shit. And it wasn’t our children’s.”

No.

Like it’s even worse then.

What kind of ice cream do you want?

Not chocolate. I’m sure it wasn’t just any other not chocolate ice cream. Oh.

So I have one for you.

Okay, good.

Never have I ever told my kid that we were out of something so that I could eat it myself after they went to bed.

Hmm. So I’m guilty of that, on many occasions, I have a weakness for these…

Jen: Dina!

Dina: I don’t know, I’m a weirdo. I don’t eat after a certain hour.

Jen: Ugh, Dina!

Lauri Walker: I’m don’t even get to eat around here. I haven’t eaten today. I had a piece of toast.

Jen: She’s so good.

Dina: I’m very regimented. I have breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner.

Jen: I did that dinner and then I have “night cheese” and then I have dessert.

“Night cheese??”

Lauri Walker: I don’t know why I’m not thinner. This is what pisses me off. I’m still 20 pounds overweight. And occasionally I get to eat a chicken nugget for lunch.

Yeah, it doesn’t matter.

Knock off a kid’s plate.

Jen: Totally. But we can wear cute shirts that I’m going to show again. And hi, it’s all of our mom curves. Whoop “Son of a nutcracker!” You like it?

Yes, I do like it.

Jen: Somehow I got all of the, the nut and, and ball, if you go to piperlou.com and use the code MomCave. You get unlimited buy one get one free, I’m just saying, okay.

Shelby’s got a good one. Did you see it? Never have I ever yelled at my kid using the dog’s name, or vice versa.

Oh for sure.

Yes, I’ve done that.

Dina: I have a dog, but I’ve used other names. Yeah.

Lauri Walker: I’ve called my kids by their birth order. One, two, three, four.

That’s good. I can remember that. Never have I ever forgotten my child’s birth date when picking up a prescription at the pharmacy?

Oh yeah.

Lauri Walker: I hate it, I hate it. When the doctor says child’s date of birth. I don’t know. There’s four of them.

Jen: It’s not actually that I’ve forgotten. It’s just that I’m on the spot now. And I have to pick the right one and I feel pressure.

Lauri Walker: Well, which one do you want? Do you want the one I like right now? Or do you want the one?

Jen: Well, and that’s usually, I think we have time for a few more. Anybody want to comment with one? Because right now Shelby is winning. Shelby’s winning the Piper Lou stuff.

Lauri Walker: Never have I ever declared a favorite kid.

Jen: I haven’t done that.

Dina: I haven’t done that.

Jen: I haven’t because I can’t, I honestly can’t decide. They both drive me crazy equally in different ways. And they’re both wonderful equally in different ways. Yeah.

Lauri Walker: Well, my kids have decided that, that they think they know which one of my kids is my favorite.

Jen: Yeah. Do they all think it’s themselves?

Lauri Walker: They all think it’s the same kid.

Right? But not okay.

Lauri Walker: They’re all wrong.

Jen: That’s funny. My grandmother sat me down once and gave me this wonderful talk about how I was her favorite, the 10 grandchildren and then as an adult, I found out she did it to all of us. She said, “Don’t tell the others, YOU are my favorite.”

Lauri Walker: That’s what I do with all of my kids.

You do?

Lauri Walker: Oh yeah. All four of them. And I consistently do that with them. And I hope that when I’m long gone, they all sit down to dinner and say, “Okay guys, here’s the deal. I just want you to know that mom told me…” And they’re all going to be like, “She told me that too!”

Dina: That’s funny.

Jen: You’ll have given them a laugh.

Lauri Walker: I think with kids, situationally, I do think you can, I think you can and should have a favorite because they’re all so different. Like one of my kids is my favorite kid to like go shopping with and interact with on certain things. And then another one has just a wicked sense of humor. And we, so my daughter is so different. She’s so empathetic and forgiving. And so they all have just different, like different situations where, you know, do I want to go shopping with my, my youngest? Oh, hell no. Please don’t but I’ll take, I’ll take my two boys. Any of my two oldest boys, anytime, but no.

This is true. There’s always a favorite for a specific activity.

Jen: All right, I’m giving you all one last chance to play I never with us and to win some awesome stuff from Piper Lou. So far, Shelby is definitely cleaning up here. Comment with something that you have done that is crazy, and you want to confess. Just confess. We’re here for you. It’s like a confession. So have you guys started your Christmas shopping at all?

I thought about a gift.

You thought of one, that, you are ahead of the game girl.

Lauri Walker: It’s like 46 days until Christmas. My friend keeps posting on her page, 46 days til Christmas, like, You know, 45 days until I’m way behind.

45 Days till I get all the gifts.

Jen: Well now, the supply chains, you’ve got to order everything now to get it in 45 days.

That is true, we’re in trouble. Get out, get on there. You can use our code to Piper Lou, to get buy one, get one free, unlimited. Sign up on the, on the sign up for the black Friday list, and you like get early, early stuff and huge-ass discounts.

I love Piper Lou. And you can have everything personalized.

Jen: It’s so cute. It’s not just stuff for, for women or for moms. I should say, like they have, they have stuff. They have dads stuff. They have things like for certain, you know, for nurses, for teachers, they have silly things and it’s fun. Yeah. I can’t wait to go and spend some money there. What is Shelby said? Oh my gosh. I did not need to know that. Too soon. I’m not sure what.

Something.

How many days til Christmas?

Oh, it’s kind of Christmas. Yeah. It’s Christmas. So you guys get on, go get your stuff. We are going to do this, Mom Games, sponsored by Piper Lou, every Wednesday night. And what?

Awesome.

Jen: Oh, I thought you said let’s go home. I’m like we are home. We’re home. We’re going to do this every Wednesday night. We’re going to play different games every Wednesday. We’re going to have prizes and awesome stuff from Piper Lou, and yeah, you gotta join us. We’re gonna have different guests every week. Lauri Walker was our inaugural guest.

Ooh. Lauri Walker is Mama Needs a Nap on all the places. So go find her, follow her.

Lauri Walker: Thank you.

Jen: She’s one of the funniest moms on the internet. Next week we have Rachel from Whine and Cheez-Its.

Lauri Walker: Oh my gosh, Rachel is the funniest mom.

Jen: She’s no, I don’t know. I’m not going to say that. It’s like the kids. I’m not going to pick a favorite. You’re all very funny. Anyway. Okay. So Shelby wins, Shelby wins and somebody else is going to win some stuff next week. So play along with us and be here. And this is going to be on all the places. So go find it on Instagram and on YouTube and on all the places. Go to MomCaveTV.com, and find Mom Games. I’m signing off, ladies.

Lauri Walker: Thanks for having me.

Jen: You are so welcome.

Lauri Walker: Cheers.

Jen: I’m gonna show my balls one more time.

Lauri Walker: Oh balls. And that escalated quickly.

Jen: It did, it did.

Lauri Walker: Wow.

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