Does your Parenting Style need a PUNCH?
(We only share things we LOVE with you. This post is sponsored by Parenting with a Punch but all opinions are our own.)
Disciplining your kids. Where do we learn to do it? How do we do it?
Are we really doing it the best we can?
I grew up with a loving, wonderful mom whom I now catch myself sounding like on a daily basis. I give my kids lots of hugs and encouragement, just like my mom did. Yet she too, was a product of her environment, and we both inherited how to discipline from our parents. Generation after generation, with some modifications for the times of course, we basically do the same shit to keep our kids in line.
Here are some of the bad habits that my family, both old and new, have participated in when it comes to kid discipline. Maybe some of these ring true for you?
I don’t think I have to delve into this one too much. I’ve done it, you have done it, your parents probably did it too. And I don’t know about you, but I’m sick of doing it.
Threatening your kids with some sort of mild physical punishment!
My mother used to threaten with the wooden spoon. It was actually kind of funny. She would chase us around the house with it. She never really hit us, but just the appearance of the spoon was threat enough to stop us from whatever misdeed we were partaking in.
I had a friend growing up who’s mom threw a slipper at her and her brother. Flip flops. Dad’s belt. Frying Pans. You name it. I have to admit, I once or twice slapped my kids hand like my grandmother used to slap mine when I would reach into the salad at the dinner table, and one time I did get put over my dad’s knee. I still remember that one! All of that was once the norm. And perhaps many of us still do these, and then there’s…
My mom was the queen of these. I remember when my sisters and I were all in trouble, my mother would place each of the 3 of us in different places in the living room. My youngest sister on the arm chair, myself on one corner of the couch, my middle sister on the other end. My mom would say, “Don’t get up till I tell you to, Don’t move, and Don’t talk to each other.” She would leave us like that for 5 to 10 minutes, which felt like an eternity, but we did think twice before repeating whatever it was that put us in those spots.
I too was a HUGE time outer with my kids. My son would get the corner near the kitchen and I would set the oven timer to as many minutes as he was old. I’ve also sent him to bed early, like HOURS early, when he was really bad. Those punishments did work, but all this negativity. It’s enough to turn your stomach. Speaking of which…
Making a child sit and eat all of their food no matter how long it takes
My sister HATED peas. I can’t really blame her. Canned Peas are awful. I’m not sure why my mom continued to make them, because whenever she did, my sister would suffer and the fighting would start. My dad would make my sister sit at the dinner table until all of her peas were gone. For HOURS! My sister would protest and dad would push and there she sat.
My mom would argue with my dad to leave her alone, and it caused so much tension, you could cut it with a knife. Fortunately for my kids the peas were traumatic enough, that I vowed never to force my kids to eat anything. I made it my business to make sure they tried healthy, fresh foods from a very young age, and I’m fortunate, because my kids aren’t picky eaters. I tried to be as positive as I could with food, and not negative. I also wondered could I be doing more like this to better parent my kids, without all the drama and stress.
Well…there is!!! Enter our MomCave Friend and Amazing Parenting Expert – Amanda Houle from parentingwithapunch.com.
Amanda Houle, MS ED, Ed created Parenting with a Punch to help parents adopt a mindset, as well as the techniques and strategies to be a confident parent. She also works with parents to create a healthy partnership with one another to support a thriving family.
She offers a WIDE variety of consulting services including 3 to 6 month consulting packages, in home services, one one one consultations AND couples retreats! This year she is offering one in Costa Rica.
Her blog is has a great deal of information and she hosts her own podcast. If you need any help with your kids – Amanda Houle’s site is a must visit!
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Watch MomCave LIVE with Amanda Houle