A Baby is Not the Best Accessory for a Job Interview | Slummy Mummy Episode Two “The Interview”
Our web series “Slummy Mummy” is back with Episode Two. Going back to work for the first time after having a baby is a minefield of potential disasters. Of course, childcare was (and still is!) my hugest challenge. And then there was the gap in my resume. Employers often ask where one has been for the last few years. (Or in my case, only months.) Oh, just raising a human! No big deal. It’s not like parenting doesn’t translate into marketable job skills. Like, oh, follow-through, commitment, strategic planning, problem solving, time management skills, and the patience of a saint.
Once you deal with childcare and the gap in your resume, you’ll then move on to fraught subject of fashion. First of all, nothing fit me! Not surprising, considering I had gained a good 25 pounds during pregnancy and was in no hurry to actually diet and exercise anytime soon.
Also, my wardrobe was hopelessly out-of-date, especially for someone who kind of worked in “fashion.” (I was working as a shoe model.) Becoming a mom left me without both the money AND the time to keep up with this season’s trends. I was lucky if my yoga pants didn’t have holes in them on any given day. So I wore a years-old dress that I thought made the most out of my new curves.
But what I didn’t count on was taking my baby to the interview. A baby does not make a good job interview accessory. Babies are loud, unpredictable, and have no idea of professional etiquette. My son didn’t understand that one can’t fart, burp, scream, and/or suck on Mama’s breast while she was talking with her prospective employer.
This episode of Slummy Mummy is based on that very instance. Because when life hands me crap, I like to make fun of it. Enjoy!
Slummy Mummy Episode Two | “The Interview”
We asked some of our best internet friends for stories of taking their kids to work, school, or job interviews. Here’s what they had to say:
- I used to take my baby to my college philosophy class (with the instructor’s permission, of course.) She wasn’t mobile then so it wasn’t too hard to have her play between my feet while I took notes. The professor was great and really supportive; he’d always say things like “Oh, she’s fine. You don’t have to take her out” when the baby started to fuss and I picked her up to leave. There was one particular day, though, when the baby filled her diaper extremely loudly and the entire class was horrified. Spoiler alert for my childless classmates that day: 3-month-olds look cute and tiny but they fart like grown men! –Jenny Evans, Unremarkable Files
- I took my first child to a performance review when she was 3 months old…I was still on maternity leave at the time. She got fussy, as babies do. My supervisor had never had kids… she seemed a little uncomfortable but we both pretended everything was totally normal while I pulled out my boob and let the baby nurse while we talked about things like productivity and teamwork…–Pam Moore, Whatevsblog
- When I was a Realtor, I brought my first born everywhere with me. He was in a Baby Bjorn at sales meetings, client meetings, and he’d tag along for showings. Most people loved having him there, they’d want to hold him and he was a great ice-breaker. The bosses were a little surprised at first when I’d roll into the office with a sleeping baby in a stroller, but then they got used to it. I could only make sales calls from the office (I didn’t have a cell phone back then, can you imagine??) and so I’d do it during nap time. He’d sleep in the stroller and I’d make my calls. –Jen Mann, People I Want to Punch in the Throat
- My husband and I (both teachers) had open house on the same night. Husband took the baby to his, I took the toddler. The toddler stood in my back room during my presentation to parents and flicked the lights on and off while staring menacingly at my audience and the baby screamed through all 7 of my husband’s presentations. Not a single person listened to a word we said, but most were certainly bemused. – sammichespsychmeds.com
- And from one very cool working non-parent: This is irrelevant but I get so excited when people bring their babies to meetings. They’re like So sorry, couldn’t find a sitter, is this okay?” And I’m like “HERE SIT WITH ME I BROUGHT TOYS AND SNACKS!” I made a little play nest out of rolling chairs for a guy who brought his five year old. He just sat back there and played with Legos. I’m like “Hi, don’t talk to strangers. Except me, I’m your Aunt now.” –Aussa, AussaLorens.com
Behind the Scenes Photos of Slummy Mummy Episode Two