World’s Worst Valentine’s Day Gifts

worst Valentine's Day gifts

I’m a holiday person. My husband, no so much. He means well. Unlike me, he doesn’t think (and by that I mean plan obsessively) about whatever the next holiday is. So, for as long as I can remember, he’s given me flowers, a card, and candy on Valentine’s Day. I probably don’t deserve much more than that, since I tend to have some deep-seated sexist view that Valentine’s Day gifts are FOR the ladies, FROM the gents. Though I’d love some big surprise this year, in the big scheme of things, I do realize that it could be much worse.

worst valentine gift momcave

Look. All I got you was a paper heart. (FreeDigitalPhotos.net/stock images)

I asked some of the web’s funniest mom bloggers to tell me about their worst Valentine’s Day Gifts ever. Puts it all in perspective!

“An ex-boyfriend got me a very large soap/shampoo stand for my bathroom to try to organize me!!” -Estelle Sobel Erasmus, Musings on Motherhood & Midlife

I had a boyfriend offer to help me stop eating carbs because it was making me fat. -Harmony Hobbs, Modern Mommy Madness

worst valentine gift ever momcave

“Aren’t I gift enough?” (FreeDigitalPhotos.Net-stockimages)

On our first valentine’s together (when I wasn’t even sure what our relationship status was) my now husband gave me comic books. Meanwhile, on that same Valentine’s Day, a nice Jewish soon-to-be-doctor (who would have made my Mom happy) asked me to go on a first date that evening and sent me a dozen roses (even though I actually told him “No” because he was a little stalkerish and there was Mr. comic book man). -Lisa Kramer, http://www.lisaakramer.com/blog/

My husband gave me a wet/dry shaver…which is ridiculous in February as I like to go full yeti all winter long -Michelle Poston Combs, Rubber Shoes in Hell

My first VALENTINES with my now husband he bought me perfume….from the dollar store….and that was all. -Jaime Cole

An STD –Samara Speaks

A microwave. -Jennifer Scharf, Mom Coms

My husband gave me a wax-dipped teddy bear about 15 years ago. It stunk of nasty old candles and was sticky-that sucker gathered dust better than a Swiffer. The bear alone would have been cute but the wax-covered stuffed animal…not so much. -Vanessa Lane

An ex boyfriend gave me a rhinestone encrusted bobby pin with a sparkly beetle bug on it. This is something I would never, ever wear. I was like what, do you know me at all?? -Pam Moore

A bouquet made of highlighters and post its was my best v day gift ever, but my friends thought it was dump worthy. #nerdy -Megan Zander, Mommyish

My ex fiancé got me a heating pad one year. –Victoria Fedden, Www.victoriafedden.com

worst Valentine's Day gifts

 

–Join the MomCave on Facebook! And if you enjoyed this post, join our email list. We send our snarky mom humor stuff, invites to our events, giveaways, and free nannies. (Well, okay… that part is a lie.)


Jen (165 Posts)

Jennifer Weedon Palazzo is the creator/writer/and producer of Mom Cave TV, an online network of comedy shows for moms including Slummy Mummy, Double Leche, Blabbermom, and MomCave LIVE. She's a working actress in NYC who has appeared in films, commercials, and some very off-off Broadway plays. When she’s not writing about the funny side of being a mom (for blogs like Scary Mommy and Mamalode) Jennifer can be found eating Reese’s Cups while furiously bidding on vintage clothing on eBay. She lives with her husband, Evan, bandleader of The Hot Sardines and two spirited children.


Comments

%d bloggers like this: